On growing up...

These days, Kade seems quite fascinated with the idea of growing up, or rather growing big. He keeps asking every day if he is big now? He says "Mom! I am getting bigger! I am almost as big as you" or sometimes even "Mom I am as big as that tree!" I usually tell him that I want him to stay little for a long time. He does not like that answer becasue he "really wants to be big"

However, we also talked about what he wanted to be when he grows up. He said he wants to be a "Daddy Policeman". He says he has a "good Dad" said, "he is nice to me" and that makes him want to be a Dad too. When we talked about him being Dad and having a new family of his own, he suddenly became very sad. He said "I dont want a new family", "I want to stay with you Mom". So I tell him, he can stay with me. When I tell him there will be one day that he wont want to give me hugs and kisses anymore, he firmly disagrees with me. Says he will "love me" his "WHOLE life." Since that discussion he still brings it up and want reassurance that he can be a daddy but not leave home!

Wow! It is amazing to watch a child develop from a truly temporal being. One who just feels the immediate and reacts to it to one with real emotions and feelings. What new parenting challenges lie ahead. I don't want to even think about all the emotions that he will experience for the first time. I know he can have so much joy and happiness ahead but then there is so many others to experience ahead. Argh, just think of middle school! I just wish I could shelter him from ever feeling pain or sadness or fear or lonlines or disappointment but I know I can't. I just have to pray that the Lord will give me the strength and wisdom to deal with it all, to help harness and divery those emotions into good. How to anchor his being in the serenity of God as the only way to have true peace.

For now, we will take advantage of all the simple pleasures that bring joy and excitement at a level that only a young child can experience - a twinkling Christmas tree, a happy, silly song, a forage through the library for books with colorful pictures, an extra high push on the park swing, collecting a bright red leaf.... And I will take every sweet hug and kiss I can get!